when I never post details of my day
to day activities on instastory
due to a preference for privacy,
and yet share some of my inner thoughts
on my blog
(like how ironic this is) –
many will post pretty picture after
pretty picture about the latest
Lady M or Cake Spade they ate,
but shy away from sharing their
deep thoughts on life.
Sometimes I am afraid of
revealing too much,
but I do cherish this space
where I can show through real sharings how God is real
and so good to me.
(Sparked from an excerpt sent from a friend.)
People usually desire to get married
because they say they are lonely.
But it’s not entirely true,
since no man’s an island
and everyone of us has a web of friends
(whether huge web or small web,
that’s another story altogether)
and a community.
What they’re really saying,
and it took me years to also realise
is “I want to be fully known and fully loved.”
They have nice fuzzy daydreams
of long walks and long talks,
and sitting beside the fireplace
and living blissfully to a ripe old age –
and always forget the reality of
our inherent sinfulness
which renders close proximity
a sphere full of conflict.
The partner living with you
(as the case with all family,
but being one flesh is peculiar)
day in day out,
will not only know the best of you,
but also the worst of you.
We want someone to know us,
and love us for us,
but they inevitably will see the worst as well,
and being fallible themselves,
may not give love fully and freely
at all times.
When you’re single,
you might not be known so intimately,
as you would if you were married.
When you’re married,
you might be intimately known
but you might not be intimately loved.
God fully knows and fully loves you –
look off man to God.
Yet another time to take stock.
How much my life has changed.
I’m nowhere near perfection,
but I’ve taken some baby steps,
and I’m glad for that.
If the Lord indeed opens that door,
that privilege will be
the best birthday gift I can receive.
I gave thee life,
now serve ye Me.